Losing a spouse is a painful experience. Grieving period is hard and widowers need the support of their loved ones to get through it. However, after some time has passed, many of them decide to give love a second chance. If you potential partner happens to be a widower, there are some things you should keep in mind. Remember that widowers dating requires a lot of patience so take things slow and don’t rush. Here are some guidelines which might help you.
Getting back on the market after a painful breakup can be very difficult. Now imagine how it must be like to start dating again after a heartbreaking experience such as losing a spouse. Widowers are entering a whole new terrifying world where they are pushed out of their comfort zone. What might feel like a small step to you to them it feels like climbing a mountain. So don’t be pushy and arm yourself with patience.
Acknowledge his past
When you start dating a new person you focus on the future and don’t discuss your previous lovers. However, when you are widowers dating rules change. You need to give him a chance to talk about his late wife or you will push him away faster than you know. She will always have a special place in his heart and if you want to date a widower you will just have to make peace with that. Give him time to find a balance between his past and his future. Let him know that it is fine with you if he wants to talk about you in your presence, just be careful he doesn’t go to the extremes. If his late spouse is all that he can talk about and instead of being his lover you are his shoulder to cry on, it is time to pack your bags. Don’t date an emotionally unavailable man who is obviously not ready to move on. Otherwise you will eventually just get hurt.
Don’t rush to meet his family and friends
His loved ones watched him lose his spouse. They felt his pain and had his back through that tough period. They are his protectors and they will do everything they can so he doesn’t get hurt again. He won’t introduce just anyone to them. If you meet his family and friends it means that you are important to him, so respect that. Keep in mind that they haven’t’ seen him with somebody else other than his wife for a long time, so it might be difficult for them. He is not the only one who has suffered a loss, they have to. Give them time to get used to the fact that you are in his life.